Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
You are the jesus of drinking
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
