she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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