how can u be prego again
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
