I think my vagina is haunted
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say š
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
And he claims I gave him āfuck meā eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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