Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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