if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
