ya dads aren't the best wingmen
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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