at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
false alarm. still invincible.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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