He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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