your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize