i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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