people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize
