if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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