i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize
