i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
3 2 1 whiskey
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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