if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I could fuck to npr.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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