what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
