I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
