You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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