I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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