Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
