Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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