it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
