Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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