just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
