So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
