Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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