Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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