It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
