you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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