she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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