$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
