id be glad to
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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