Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize