Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
