I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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