Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize