I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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