do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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