We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
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Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
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Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
where are my eyebrows?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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