There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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