yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize