just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
