What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
