garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
actually, I'm a sock model
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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