You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
