You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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