Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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