At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
