remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize