Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Randomize
